shoot anonymous - because if we just walk together like this, wherever we go, it’ll be heaven

from the beginning

On Tuesday, September 13, 2022 at 4:00 AM Fiction & Fact ♥

Well, kemaren gw baca blog ny daguu. Ukhh, jadi keinget pas masa” baru masuk kls 10. bahagia karena sekelas sma org” yg gw kenal tpi pisah sma tmen” gw di 9c. Mos & Ldk yg sgt mnyusahkan tpi yahh seru jg si. Digodain tiap hari ==”. Foto” norak rame” klo sempet wktu. Masa”nya gw bosen bgt bgt sama idup gw. Masuk MD tapi kluar lagi gara” sesuatu. Ngeliat org yg gw suka dmen sma tmen gw sndiri. Sampe ada kambing ngajak gw chat cuma buat nyuruh buka web setan. Pret ! wkaka. Yahh, paling engga, idup gw uda mule mnyenangkan lah mulai dri situ. Aw aw ;) Disensiin sma temen sndiri gara” gw dket sma gebetan ny. Serba salah gw. pel komp slalu buat maenan game" serem, kocak dah. wkaka. Berlanjut lagi smpe kemur cup. Ntn in yg pada tanding smpe emosi trus keki gara” gabisa dteng ntn futsal pas hari minggu *gilaa, inget bgt gua* Geregetan sma kue jahe ntah knapa. Wkwkw. Diem”an sma org gara” kata ciee == Ulum gw terdampar di ruang 1 sndirian, hikss, suram aslii :( Nyontek jdi mkanan sehari” *prah asli. Bkin suprise party buat tetep, robin, dagu. Ultah gw yg biasa ajee. Ng’galau tiap hari smpe bkin nama samaran brengan sma si dagu. Ahaii keep texting with that “monkey & goat” selalu seneng klo ada kejadian. Wohoo ! :o mau gila klo inget tanggal 15 des & 15 sesudahnya x_x berkenalan dengan that silly” sky == ckck. Go to cafstro with others & dibkinin rencana super anehh tapi akhirnya nyenengin juga si. aw aw, ehem :$ Uyee ! then gw yg slalu takut klo mau turun ke kantin & tmbah pngen mampus klo uda mau pulang. Byk kejadian tak terduga, ckck. Di smperin pas istirahat ato kpanpun & demi apapun gw pngen nangis gara” takut diliat jamur. dikasih blablabla & sgla mcm kata” aneh. Until he knows that i like juno ! hahaha. Tpi ttep ajee ga nyerah smpe gw tolak bner”. msn’an tiap hri sma jamur sorban trus ditanyain mlo “juno spe si ?” behh, trus anak kls 3 nyariin juno == kampretlatos tuhh kepoo ! dahh ahh, kyk ny uda kepanjangan.

Hikss, 2 bulan lagi bakalan kls 11. hikss, psti suasana kelas ny bkal beda bgt dehh. Beradaptasi lagi sma anak” dri kls laen. Yang gw takutin sih bukan itu tapi ada lahh pkk ny. Hikss ! mau gilaa klo inget”. Aaaaa, pengen puter waktu ke awal kls 10 lg dehh. I need doraemonn ! :(

sbenernya sih msih byk kejadian tapi yahh mau smpe berapa post baru kelar. wkaka, dahh lahh. kejadian" dri awal masuk kn slalu gw tulis di diary jdi yahh klo mau baca tinggal buka dehh. ahaha, ga sia" gw nulis. ahayy ƪ(˘▽˘)┐ ƪ(˘▽˘)ʃ ┌(˘▽˘)ʃ

---> hidup contekann =="

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face the truth

On Monday, May 21, 2012 at 8:58 PM Fiction & Fact ♥

*speechless*
*die in shame*
*kill me right now*
you will always win ! they will always win !
you will always know everything !
secret, weakness, feeling. everything !
after all, it haven't finish. the truth keep coming out, one by one, everyweek.
im onmyway but i ALWAYS stuck. again and again.
arrgghh ! F with the truth !

anyway, r.i.p twinkle :'( i'll be alone if no one at home :(
my heart broke when i saw her just sleeping in a box.
she just slept and her eyes won't open anymore
there won't be a noisy barking voice when i go home :(
twinkle :'( HIKS !

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am I that hopeless ?

On Saturday, November 12, 2011 at 8:45 PM Fiction & Fact ♥

yesterday was 11.11.11, well, nothing special happened. i guess, i couldn't expected much from that date.
actually, i felt that yesterday was my super damn day.
why ?
my mood was really terrible and that's made me more sensitive than usual.
what's wrong with me ?

btw, i'm not expecting for someone will purpose to me or whatever.
i just want, in that day, something good will come to me and make my day.
but, reality was different. nothing special happened ! well, i can't give to much hope for that kind of things.

hmm, another "sad"satnight. it just the same old things. single or taken, it's the same for me. i never have my satnight. eventhough, i GOT boyfriend, yaa, you know what. no satnight at all ! i can accept it but i can't lie to myself that i really want to feel that satnight with someone i love. so frustrating !

love is so complicated right ?
single or taken, everything about love is so damn complicated
why it has to be so complicated ? can't it be a simple one ?

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All by myself

On Thursday, October 6, 2011 at 10:30 PM Fiction & Fact ♥

You cry at night. Your parents don't know, your brothers don't know, your friends don't know, your boyfriend doesn't know. You just carry on your day when you wake up, pretend that nothing happen and everything is okay. You put a big smile in your face, laughing freely. But, the pain is always there with you all day long. You just hide the feelings and also the tears. You are good at acting, it seems like nobody knows your true feelings. They don't know that you're crying in class when you pretend to be fall asleep. You do all your daily activity with a fake smile. When you're alone or daydreaming, you will always want to cry because you remember all the problems. You feel so frustrated and depressed. When others ask you why, you just smile and say 
"i'm okay"
well, i guess, i'm strong enough to face it :)

i got this sentences from ........ ellie :p
haha, this is just a paragraph after all, no need to worry

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Retreat ♥ \(‾▽‾)/

On Saturday, October 1, 2011 at 9:37 PM Fiction & Fact ♥

just arrived at home 2 hours ago and now i'm alone at home ! what a life -_- retreat done ! ihiyy ! awalnya malesin bgt tapi pas uda dijalanin, not bad juga. yang malesin paling cuma session" acaranya. bosen gila dengerin ceramah, ga ngerti wehh =_= diluar itu, semuanya nyenengin ! \(‾▽‾)/ jadi ga kepengen pulang pas detik" terakhir

maen ayunan sempit"an trus kenceng" smpe ayunan ny uda gerak" mau mental, dikerjain abis"an pas naek jungkat jungkit *sial yang pada ngerjain gw, groarr ! wkakak, ada sesi nembak" si melissa surya sama tupai febri. wkaka, heboh bgt 1 angkatan, ngakak" ! api unggun, roti bakar, dduk di bawah pohon sambil sakit maag, ngeliatin yg pda couple. asik ya, haha !! tapi yang pas mulai dari sore itu uda seru" bgt. huahaha ! meskipun malemnya ada sedikit kejadian. well, im glad that my friends beside me that time :') heheh, mandi jem 12 malem abis itu maen baru tidur. biar cuma tdur 4jem'an, gw masih bisa ngimpi. well, gw bngung asli sama itu mimpi ==" anting pake ilang sgala lg, dah lah, anggep buang sial

besoknya games ! lalala ! untung aje licia bawa catokan, klo engga, gw gatau gmna poni gw stelah maen cebur"an. kaki masih sakit klo napak gara" nyebur ke kolam ==

overall, i enjoyed every seconds in there \(‾▿‾\)┌(_O_)┐ (/‾▿‾)/ thanks yg uda pda ngerjain gw, bikin gw ketawa ngakak, bikin gw treak". paling engga, gw jadi sedikit lupa sama yg namanya galau, haha. ng'galau disitu sih suasana ny mndukung bgt, aplg malem" dibawah pohon. behh !
pkknya, retreat kali ini sesuatu bangettttt ! wkwkwk *sry deh ya kalo lebay, haha !

anyway, today is the first day of October ! bye September ! you've been a nice month for me :) i was satisfied with everything :) :)
#octoberwish
i wish nothing ! all i want is just happiness. going through the day with laugh at school, home and everywhere.
no sadness ! no tears ! no heartbreak ! less problems ! bless my UTS also !
Godblessme and everyone who deserve it ! amin ! (‾ʃƪ‾)

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d.a.m.n

On Wednesday, September 7, 2011 at 10:16 PM Fiction & Fact ♥

hmm, i deleted my last post. why ? i don't know. since first, i already don't want to published it but myself told me to published it. well, the next day, i felt like i have to deleted that post. hihihi, i feel much better after deleting it :'D
aaaaa, today is the last day of my holiday. hikss, wanna cry a lot ! kenapa liburnya ga sampe hari senen aje si ? duhh, mana uda ga boleh bolos lagi :'( :'( sakit mendadak dong ato apa kek gtu yang bikin gw ga masuk sekolah besok. haishh, i'm not ready for school ! seriously ! gabisa tidur pagi lagi, gabisa bangun siang lagi, gabisa bebas lagi. tapi yahh itu kewajiban, mau gimana lagi ?

yesterday, i went to salon with ence ! hahayy ! gw potong poni dan .................. jadinya aneh. mau nangis gw. mestinya gw potong rata aje noh, bodo amat dahh mau kayak jamur ato engga. duhh, poni cepetan panjang dongss. rambut juga cepetan panjang dong. bingung gw, padahal dulu panjang nya cepet, kenapa sekarang jadi lama bgt ya ? orang" mah uda pada panjang rambutnya, gw masih sebahu lebih dikit terus =_=
duhh, sudahlah, besok mau gamau mesti masuk. Godblessmetomorrow, amin (‾ʃƪ‾)

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which better ?

On Monday, September 5, 2011 at 2:20 AM Fiction & Fact ♥

yeyy, forget my last post ! why ? because, mtv world stage ada siaran ulangnya ! gyahaha ! oke lupakan

huaa, sepi lagi rumah gw. no more laughing, no more fighting, no more yelling. it's just so quiet. sometimes, i like to be alone. no disturbers or else. but i like it better when suddenly, my house become noisy again like long time ago. so, which better ? well, i guess, it can't be helped :/ i must strong enough to through everything. past is past, it can't be changed.
my bro si vincent yang kepo itu, yang suka ngeliatin orang maen, yang suka bacain chat orang, yang suka liatin hp orang, yang suka ceng"in + ngeledek gw juga. grr ! dasar kau penghianat desa ! kalo uda tau segala macem yahh diem aje, gausa tereak". bikin malu == emang bocah selalu gabisa diem, ckck. tapi yahh tetep aje dia yang paling baik, hihiyy \☺/

school will start several days again. AAAAAAA ! i'm not ready for it. test again, homework again, meet the teacher again, sit down for 7 hours again. huaaa ! wanna back to the first day of holiday. ckck, when holiday i wanna school. when school days i wanna holiday. human never satisfied, right ?

jadwal tidur makin parah, jem segini aje belom tidur. that's why, knapa klo uda kelar ol, gw males buat ol lagi. yahh, gara" ntar kebablasan kyk sekarang ini. ga ngantuk" jadinya, ckck. gimana ntar pas masuk sekolah ? yahh, gampanglah. palingan tidur dikelas (y) wkaka

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On Monday, August 1, 2011 at 3:06 PM Fiction & Fact ♥

first day of august. time turns so fast, hmm. feels like yesterday still february -_- hahaha.

#augustwish
be blessed in everything, feels comfortable with my new class, stay close with my besties even though we're not in the same class again, more patience ! longlasting relationship ! less problems, less fight, less short conversation, no changeable mood again. all I want is better than last month !!!
Amin !! (‾ʃƪ‾)
errr, last month is kinda ....... *ahh, i don't know what to say*

hmm, i don't want to remember July. too much galau, too much sad, too much changeable mood *my friends knew it :')*

Quote of the day
People change & things go wrong, but always remember Life goes on


goodbye July ! i don't want to remember you !
welcome august ! please be nice to me :) :)

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hell-o first monday !

On Monday, July 18, 2011 at 6:11 PM Fiction & Fact ♥

holiday is over & now back to school. kelas baru, wk baru, meja baru, tmen sebangku baru, suasana baru, semua baru ! groarr ! sama skali belom terbiasa, duhh -_-" pgen balik pas ke kls 10 dehh. kyknya uda enak bgt itu. tmen uda pda ngumpul smua kec si ence trus tmpat dduk ude pas bgt. tmen skelas juga pda enak". aaaaaa ! cepet bgt ya uda kls 11, perasaan kmaren baru msuk gtu :( stress gw -- yg laen gtu juga ga si ato cma gw doang ?

i'm gonna miss tmen sebangku gw si bellykwang, huooo ! dlu klo mau curhat tinggal nengok trus ngerjain itu anak jg bisa stiap saat trus lari"an klo abis dri wc smbil maen air. gaada yg gw kerjain lg dong di kls ntar ? duhh, mcm org gila. wkeke, skrg aje tiap mlem ngayal gila"an mlo sma dy smpe ngakak". hebat bner ni otak klo buat ngayal, wkaka.

tadi saya ke cp sma dina, djee & vivi. yuhuu ! prtama sevel dlu abis itu ke rmah vivi gnti baju. di ruma vivi ktawa" smpe kyknya kdengeran smpe depan sma sebelah kli yaa. wkaka, abis itu baru ke cp. mkan trus fto box. ngakak" lg di ftobox, dodol. tiap kli ftobox psti slalu ngakak bngung gw -_- huaha, abis itu ke gramed beli PJP ! wohoo ! ntar mlem baca dehh gw, gyahaha ! ehh, tpi kn gw blom slese sampul buku. aaaaa ! =_____________=


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life, laugh and .........

On Sunday, July 3, 2011 at 11:02 PM Fiction & Fact ♥



i got from someone's blog. errr, but several things DOESN'T MATCH with me. hahaha ! also i still have so much 'best things' with my own way :) :)




hmm, this is a doll or pillow ? ahh, i don't know. maybe doll but looks like a pillow -_-" i already 2nd senior highschool but i still like this kind of thing. ahahaha ! yaa, i still like dolls BUT i hate animal dolls except teddy bear or cartoon characters. my auntie bought me *thanks tante, hoho* my cousin also have so this's kind of twin things, yeyy ! ƪ(˘▽˘)ʃ



no lying, i envy with my elementary school's friend. aaaa ! she watched beast in singapore. groarr ! *gigit kuku* kapan yaa beast dateng kesini ? hdehh, i wanna watch them so bad ! yoseob & dongwoon, ulalala
ƪ(♥ε♥)ʃ they held a concert in malaysia too. errr, masa indo kaga si ? ahh, pkknya msti ntn lahh klo mereka konser disini. gamau tau, HAHAHA. i'm kinda freak yaa ? whatever ~

i'm feeling weird. is it because i'm always alone all this time ? gw jadi ga terbiasa denger bacotan ny ade gw. hmm, trutama sma yg kecil. it feels like there's a space between the 3 of us. i'm afraid that i won't be their usual sister they ever known, i've changed a lot. is it because of my mood or my personality change over time ? hmm, maybe our surroundings are different. i'm in here & they're in there. we meet only a few months, when holiday come. right now, i'm feeling so bad. what kind a sister i am ? :(

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boo !

On Friday, February 11, 2011 at 11:44 PM Fiction & Fact ♥

hmm, tdinya gw mau nulis blog pke b.ing tpi ga jadi ahh, ntar dikirainnya sok"an lagi, huaha. yesterday, my daddy back from Japan ! hikss, enak bner yee. gw jadi pgen ke sno juga. pas disno, dy bbm gw fto hotelnya. kbetulan pas lagu turun salju. hdehh ! mau mau mau ! oleh"nya, dy bawain gw kyk celengan kucing sma permen hello kitty gtu. huu, sebenernya gw nitip 1 brang yaitu jamur ! wkakakaka dari pas gw ke HK, gw cariin itu maenan. alhasil tiap hari gw maen yang capsule" gtu lohh. yg dimasukkin koin trus ntar kluar brangnya. wktu itu gw uda ktemu mesinnya tapi koinnya ga ckup gra" gw uda maen yg lain. arrgghh, kampretss ! akhirnya slama di HK gw kaga ketemu tuh jamur, sial ! yaudelahh, ntar juga ketemu sndiri klo ga dicari, HA HA HA ohh yaa, gw jadi kangen pas ke HK dehh. arrgghh ! pgen kesno lagi, tiap pagi kluar aprtemen trus jalan smbil dingin" pke mantel. hikss, ntar dehh ad ftonya T_T
2 hari lagi, valentine day ! ya ya ya, masih merayakan dengan single status, ahaii ! sedihnyongeliatparacouplentarpastgl14. aaaaaa ! bsokkannya tgl keramat pula, WTH?! tapi tak apalahh :(
school life ? behh, biasa aje ! jeng jeng ! tiap hari cuma dateng, duduk, buka buku, belajar smbil ngobrol, istirahat, makan, blajar smbil ngobrol lagi, istirahat, jalan ke 10c, blajar smbil ngobrol lagi, doa, pulang, jajan, nympe rumah. klo ad ulngan bru ad tmbahan, bkin contekan ! wkakaka. klo kyk gini, jadi kangen pas kls 9c, ahh, THE BEST CLASS EVER. ga ad noh yg namanya musuh"an, damai lah pkknya tuh kelas. 1 sma lain juga sling membaur gtu. tapi yahh sudahlah, itu sudah lewat. hueheh :(




HK trip :


*with my cousin*

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Teardrops On My Guitar :')

On Tuesday, September 28, 2010 at 7:21 AM Fiction & Fact ♥

Drew looks at me
I fake a smile so he won't see
What I want and I need
And everything that we should be

I'll bet she's beautiful
That girl he talks about
And she's got everything
That I have to live without

Drew talks to me
I laugh 'cause it's just so funny
I can't even see
Anyone when he's with me

He says he's so in love
He's finally got it right
I wonder if he knows
He's all I think about at night

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing
Don't know why I do

Drew walks by me
Can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes, so perfectly
The kind of flawless I wish I could be

She better hold him tight
Give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes
And know she's lucky 'cause

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing
Don't know why I do

So I drive home alone
As I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down
And maybe get some sleep tonight

'Cuz he's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing
Don't know why I do
He's the time taken up but there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into

Drew looks at me
I fake a smile so he won't see


ahhh, ni lagu artinya dalem bgt. gw uda tau ni lagu dari lama tpi baru skrang klik sama gw. hahha :')

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